Why do I have to come up with one of these?

I think I'm just going to start titling these with numbers. Not in any order, but whatever number tickles my fancy when I happen to write one of these. This would be called one, though not because it's the first one I would write with numbers as the title. The next one will likely be titled 666 (if I wrote it write after this, as I would change my mind by the time I write here again).

The english language is great. There are so many windy windy things that make your head spin. Then you can write right rites while wearing only tights. This will however leave you, and ewe, open to criticisms that are unwarranted, which two too many to like to wear tutus. I think you get the point. Meatings can be fun too, especially when it's work related. If you really want to make it more fun, you can start to mix english with say spanish (spanish is the language I'm most familiar with after english). Then instead of calling someone a pendejo, which is just offensive and naughty, you can say instead to them, "Oye, dejaste tu pluma." which means "hey, you dropped your pen." Think about it, you'll realize how stupid it is in a second, but I still am amused by it. Too many words go unused, neglected and otherwise left out in the cold while other words are severely overused, abused and mistreated. We should start looking for words that are underprivileged and start to bring them into normal daily use. This will help to bring a more diversificationing of our slowly denigrating language and hopefully cause some immolations to bring about awareness of their plight. I thought of another joke I came up with, but it's not appropriate, and I'm trying to be more appropriate in some ways.

I had a small epiphany the other night (not the holiday, though that would have been nice too) and it was most enlightening. I've lost four pounds since then, and I haven't had to change my eating habits. If you really want to lose weight, eat nothing but sugary foods and walk up all the stairs you can find. You'll be amazed by where you can go.

Did you know Dr. Seuss inordinately disliked children? We could have been good friends. Not that I dislike children, they are particularly good with dinner rolls and gravy. Caffeine is also a poison. Not one of those stupid things like, "Anything in excess will kill you." It really is a poison. They also put vegetable oil in Mt. Dew. I say this because I really like Mt. Dew. It's always a good idea to know what it is that you're eating/drinking and where it has been. If it's been over to see your neighbor, the creepy one that watches you take the garbage out through their blinds and probably thinks you are the taliban, you probably should throw it away at work so he doesn't see you doing it.

Some pEople arE obseSsed With caPitalizing on othErs misFortunes. I find this abhorrent. I also find Pop music abhorrent and no one seems to be doing anything about it. Perhaps I should right my politicians and get them working on both of these problems, they don't seem to be doing anything impotent at the moment.

That was fun. I hop you didn't disenjoy it more than I didn't not enjoy it.